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hightide24
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Name: shazi
Location: United States
Interests: I love taking pictures of the sunset, the sisterhood of the traveling pants, spiderman, bob barker, eve 6, kaiser cheifs, heartful, corny quotes, the little jokes at the end of reader's digest, finding "perfect" clouds, parties, swimming, polar bears, somosas, old navy, khols, sprite remix, loose flipflops with the hula straw stuff, funny nick names, painting pots, painting without being graded on it, classes with my friends, the drew carey show, seinfield, secrets, playing cranium and balderdash, watching twilight zone, listening to songs i havent heard for months, even years, rediscovering old socks and t-shirts, reading subscribtions, drawing while i talk on the phone, jogging with a friend, hearing a song u love on the radio, and most importantly my friends/family
Expertise: snapshoting a sunset
Occupation: Manufacturing/production
Industry: Textiles
Message: message me
Member Since:
5/5/2005
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| Arvide Abernathy: And I never saw until now how much in love with him you are.
Sergeant Sarah Brown: I'll get over it.
Arvide Abernathy: Why would anyone want to get over the one thing you hope for from the minute you're born and remember until the day you die?
Sergeant Sarah Brown: I'll get over it.
Arvide Abernathy: Why? Because it's the greatest reward that woman or man can have on this earth? To love and to be loved? I watched this play this morning and it was funny because all the people who played the characters in middle school really did do the part well. and in a weird sense, their personalities matched too. I thought it was cute coming from arvide abernathy since it was his place that had been the hot spot for the sinners the night before. but its so rare that someone of that sort to follow such a clear intuition and have such blind trust. Perhaps he was old enough to konw that true love turns a person honest. | | |
| http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M7-jiEbWUUc General Apathy and Major Boredom singing whatever | | |
| We all seem to go through these phases where "we do what we must and call it by the best names." I always thought everyone worked like that. Until very recently, I believed that everybody tried to put a positive spin on their actions to make themeslves feel better about whatever it was they were doing and I never found it to be a big deal. Sometimes its little white lies. Suppose you don't want to call someone who needed something, but instead of feeling guilty about being a bad friend and not calling back, you tell yourself, "oh, I just didn't want to bother them with my phone call in case they might have been busy." Bad example maybe, but so many of us have been there. It's these silly excuses to avoid guilt and blame because while it was a mistake, atleast it was noble. And its not just excuses to get out of a sticky situation, its excuses we keep for ourselves in our own brains.
Some people are quite the opposite. They know what they are feeling is far from benevolence and find it easier to just say it out loud. Get it out of there system by confiding to somone else who wouldn't really mind the burden of knowing since guilt is only a personal opponent. A few months ago, a friend came to me complaining about her friend who took things to help her concentrate when studying for exams and ended up doing really well. I asked her if she was upset because she was concerned for her friends health. And she looked at me and said, "No, its just annoying because I don't take anything and just study the old fashioned way and she does better than me!" Then she laughed at me for trying to make it sound like a noble complaint.
Even in my weakest moments when I break down about something horrible like jealousy or insecurity or guilt, I somehow try to make it seem, to myself and to others, that there is a more selfless reason for my anger. But for sure, I am not alone in this. My favorite is in apologies. When people are still upset and do not want to take the stab at their dignity and apologize, they find a way to somehow turn their sorry into something noble so atleast they can come out the argument as the "better one." Its usually with family or people you are trying to gain the respect of.
And other times, its just trying to cover up a fault that you've found in yourself. I guess this all came to me when I thought about a friend of mine who hsa remained very close to an ex-girflriend and has made excuse for being so nice to her and treating her so well. He flirtswith her often and makes sure she never knows much about any new girls he is seeing since they broke up. I asked him why and he said it was because he had hurt her so much and he didn't want to hurt her anymore. But the truth is, he just likes to be her number one guy. He likes knowing that she still loves him and needs him. And that made me realize, even a guy as as great as this friend of mine, someone so secure and confident, even he sometimes needs to make an excuse for himself. The fact is, we all have way too many faults that can't be erased. And if you truly believe you are trying to be a good person, a smudge in your thoughts to ease your soul shouldn't do much harm. | | |
| So class of 2008, its been a year since our Senior Prom. I am not sure why it was all so exciting but it really was a great night, and I have to say, I loved every moment that went into planning it, complaining about it, getting overexcited about it, and now I love reminiscing about it. I don't think everyone felt like it was going to be one of the most amazing nights everrrr. But somehow it made us all feel really good to know that the summation of our high school lives would be singled down to one evening... and a long, tired night. I remember I'd come to random enhancements and we'd have the daily prom conversation. But my most vivid memory is Senora Gav's room and we were sitting by the dysfunkshunal microwave. Rach had all these dress magazines and we were going through the computers looking at dresses. And there were probably underclassmen getting ansty because they wanted to finish their homework, but Gav's couldn't yell at her enhancement seniors to get off. And I don't know why, but all that meant so much to me. And it makes me really happy to know that now class of 2009 got to experience it. They got to be the enhancement seniors of their favorite class and throw things at Mr. Shiller and talk to him about that party on Friday. lolz. And sitting up at the top section for lunch. And not really caring what happened because you knew the way the school worked so well that you just high fived vector security and went on your way or snuck out of band early so you could just walk around the neighborhood. I remember rushing to get my hair done at my cousins apartment and I refused to go anywhere else because I wanted her to do my hair and no one else. And then I started to cry because I was missing pictures and the traffic was so bad. So they replaced me with Mummah. lolz. And I loved being a spoiled little princess for that one day. Riding the trolly up to prom was great but the ride to post prom was even more amazing because we got to see all the things they did to the school. Looking back on senior year, I remember thinking, wow I can't wait to go to college. Life is going to be amazing. And it is, but wow, Senior year is just one of those years I will remember forever-- including Prom, the Senior trip, hanging out at Kid's Dream Playground, laughing at anything and everything, walks around the 'hood, awkward moments, the people we knew. I hope class of 2009 cherishes all this too : ) | | |
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